The Beat

Baggage Claim

I hate movies with clichés and Baggage Claim is a bunch of overplayed clichés. At times funny, but clichéd up to the hills.

Montana, played by the bright and preppy Paula Patton, is a air hostess who has thirty days to find a date to her younger sister’s wedding. But she doesn’t just want a date to the wedding, she wants to find the one *insert Almighty eye roll* After being romanced by her latest squeeze, the forever HOT Boris Kodjoe, she discovers that he is married and his wife is knocked up. She’s distraught and embarks on a pity party with her best friends and co-workers, the requisite gay best friend is of course present and this is where they cook up their master plan- for her to embark on a hamster race working her way through her exes in order to find that somebody in thirty days.

Cliché One- Montana’s momma is on her case about getting married because its starting to become a little embarrassing now that her younger sister is getting married before her.

Cliché Two- Because of her job as an air hostess Montana is able to hop on a flight, which any of her exes are on, at a moment’s notice, so she can feel them out and see if they are suddenly husband material. That part is funny and maybe not the biggest of clichés, but a cliché still.

Cliché Three- She goes on dates with her exes and gets a series of rude awakenings. There’s one who won’t really commit but wants and international booty call- Djimon Hounsou, another who’s dating a sugar mama and takes Montana to his mama’s home- Trey Songz, another who’s a candidate for political office, Taye Diggs…and so the clichés go.

Cliché Four- In a bid to find “the one” Montana finds herself, yes I know, this old cliché too.

Cliché Five- Montana’s BFF is her neighbour, played by Derek Luke, who she went to high school with. He’s the guy she should’ve hooked up with, the one she always calls when she’s in a jam but he is in a relationship with another girl…yeah you see where I’m going.

Cliché Six- After this round the way trip with all these other men “the one” she should be with was right on her doorstep. And his name is Mr Wright. 

Cliché Seven- The Paris is romantic cliché

Even Paula Patton’s sparkly girl next door candour cannot save this substandard mess. I’ll save you the time and effort and say yes she does get together with Mr Wright and they will go on to live happily ever after no doubt. As if you didn’t already know.

Other clichés happen in the movie, you know Montana gives a talk at her sister’s engagement party and her younger sister then realises that she is not ready for marriage at such a young age and they call the wedding off. Oh and Montana proudly proclaims she is happy being who she is, true love or not…yada, yada, yada…

The dialogue is flat and annoying, there’s a bogus analogy about the relevance of being a Lady or some such nonsense in there but the most annoying line was delivered by Jill Scott.

“…men are intimidated by strong women.”

I can’t tell you how irritation it is to hear this line constantly in movies or some variation of it. Its such a stupid statement that I want to personally crucify any one who puts this in a movie. Its bullshit and all it does is reinforce the sexist clichés abundant in Hollywood. I’m not going to go into that but I’m sure you can draw the conclusions.

Then you have the theme of the film which in itself is a problem, there is no evolution, no heart, no substance, a few laughs certainly but it does nothing different. Its like someone pieced together sappy fridge magnets for a script. This movie says nothing different just another wheel on the romcom bus beating the same old path going round and around…

Great cast but its a shame the producers really didn’t know what to do with them.

I’d sit this out and wait for the TV release.